I know you're just ranting, and you certainly have the right. The thing is, people ARE used to thinking of gender as binary. It is damn hard, if you don't yourself identify as genderqueer (hell, maybe even if you don't), to think any other way, even if you're not on some kind of "male and female he created them" kick. I know I've made an effort without much success, and I've known (and sometimes lived) with genderqueer folks pretty much my whole adult life.

Maybe it's different if you're not raised to think that way, you know? Maybe those of us who have kids can have some success in raising them to be more....uh....what would be the right word? Genderblind? Not sure. Anyway, I know that to the extent I could I've tried to do that with my kids, and I know that they're far less "set" in that sense than I myself am. So maybe there's hope.