(no subject)

You are Tsukino Usagi

You are love food, boys, shopping, and hanging out with your friends. You tend to cry when things get too hard, and have trouble doing things right the first time. You probably need to study a little harder. Your faith in the basic goodness of all people keeps you on the right track, even when others don't see it.

Take the "What Magic Girl are you?" Quiz

(no subject)

I found this on the local pagan list and thought I'd share.

Subject: Holiday Shopping Fun

Fifteen things to do at Wal-Mart while your significant other is taking
his/her sweet time:

1- Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they
aren't looking.

2- Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.

3- Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.

4- Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3 in
housewares', ...and see what happens.

5- Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6- Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7- Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll
only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.

8- When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't
you people just leave me alone?'

9- Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you
pick your nose.

10- While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows
where the anti-depressants are.

11- Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from
'Mission Impossible'.

12- In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size
funnels.

13- Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through say 'PICK
ME!! PICK ME!!!!'

14- When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal
position and scream 'NO! NO! It's those voices again.'



...and last but not least,

15- Go into a fitting room and yell real loudly ...'Hey! We're out of
toilet paper in here!'

ACK!!!!!!!!!!

What Child of the Eighties Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Another jewel of intellectual brightness

When you've had an "I hate my job" day try this:

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy
and go to the thermometer section. You will need to
purchase a rectal thermometer made by "Johnson and
Johnson." Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the drapes,
and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed
during your therapy. Change to very comfortable
clothing, such as a sweat suit and lie down on your
bed.

Open the package and remove the thermometer.
Carefully place it on the bedside table so that it
will not become chipped or broken.
Take out the material that comes with the thermometer
and read it. You will notice that in small print there
is a statement: "Every rectal thermometer made by
Johnson and Johnson is personally tested" Now close
your eyes and repeat out loud five times: "I am so
glad I do not work for quality control at the Johnson
and Johnson Company".

Have a nice day folks and remember, there is always
someone with a worse job than yours